Category: Sexual Therapy

Sexual therapy – Improve your sexual health and well-being with my professional hypnotherapy services and techniques

  • Addressing Sexual problems

    Addressing Sexual problems

    Sex. It happens around 100 million times each day, most of us have it, most of us want it, most of us enjoy it – yet still nobody wants to talk about it. But have you used hypnotherapy for addressing sexual problems?

    Sex, the last taboo?

    Most people say that sexual problems have affected their relationship in some way. After all, sex serves several other functions aside from reproduction, including bonding and stress release. With increasing demands being placed upon people’s time and energy it isn’t uncommon for one partner to be raring to go whilst the other would prefer to hit the snooze button. And if the problem isn’t how often, the next most common issue is how well it’s done.

    Whatever the sexual problems might be though, the first port of call should always be a visit to the doctor so that physical causes can be eliminated. Once it is clear that the problem is not physical, this is where hypnotherapy may be able to help. 

    So what can hypnotherapy actually do? 

    Whilst many individuals will naturally assume that a physical matter lies at the root of their problem, in actual fact many sexual dysfunctions are psychological. With factors such as stress, anxiety, depression and past sexual abuse all coming into play. 

    Typical sexual problems include:

    • Difficulty responding sexually
    • Erectile dysfunction (ED)
    • Anorgasmia
    • Low sexual desire (libido)
    • Premature ejaculation
    • Vaginismus

    Loss of libido

    A reduced sex drive is a common problem that affects both men and women at some point in their lives. There’s no ‘normal’ level of libido, but if you find a lack of desire distressing or it’s affecting your relationships, then it’s probably a very good idea to get help. Stress, anxiety and even exhaustion can have a significant impact on your sex drive.

    As much as you focus on the problem, it can so easily be simply a case of helping you with tiredness, or reducing stress and anxiety. Self-limiting beliefs often crop up – For instance “I don’t give pleasure to my partner” – thoughts such as these can lead to feelings of anxiety and unreasonable performance expectations and can subsequently cause sexual issues to develop. 

    As you can imagine, depression impacts on all areas of your life. But this includes your sex life too. Where prescribed medication is involved, it’s important to speak to your GP to see if the tablets you’re taking may be causing some unwanted side effects with your sex drive.

    Intimacy

    As an example, I help people change perceptions about sexual intercourse or intimacy so that it can be seen as a positive experience and the treatment will also negate the effects of over-anxiety. This can lead to stress, which can make a significant impact on the quality of life and wellbeing. Anxiety and stress can manifest itself differently for everyone but there are often physical and psychological side effects which can be alleviated through hypnotherapy.

    Many of these sexual issues can result from earlier emotional experiences. They can often become repressed and buried into the subconscious part of the mind. As you can imagine, we can also build a negative image about them and turn them into a bigger problem than they need be. So, the key principles of hypnotherapy involve inducing a relaxed state of mind in the client. This state of mind then allows for positive messages to be delivered to the subconscious during this state in a bid to replace any negative or self-limiting thought patterns. 

    As a qualified hypnotherapist here in Cornwall, I could be the first stepping stone towards driving out any sexual issues from underneath the covers. You can also be assured that the issue will be treated with the utmost confidentiality and with due regard to your wishes. Chatting through it during an initial consultation will take into consideration all of the above, and will start to put that wonderful process of putting your mind at ease once again.

  • Surviving an Affair?

    Surviving an Affair?

    I don’t know whether any of you reading this article will have had an affair or maybe contemplated it.

    Or even possibly fantasised about it without acting on it.  But, what I do know is that many relationships won’t survive an affair.

    So the people who get caught, and lets face it most do, will find their relationship in disarray and have no hope of surviving an affair.  The regret they feel and constant deliberation over how they could be so stupid takes over.  The ultimate self-sabotage, so why do people still do it?

    We are all human beings, with basic instincts that sit below what we call our humanity.  In other words, a basic primal need to procreate.  A strong biological basis that drives our emotions which comes from our primitive brain.  Rationalising some of those emotions begin and we even lie to ourselves.  Our minds begin to process the benefits and minimise the risks.

    There is a scene in the film Love Actually. Harry is seen trying to buy some jewellery for Mia, before his wife catches him.  The impatience and urgency when trying to buy the jewellery and hoping he’s not seen.  And then the resultant denial when Karen (his wife) finds him.  This may well be a romantic comedy, but I’m sure this gets replayed for real the world over.

    That may well be a film, but in reality… you see the hurt not just to your respective partner but your children and even friends.  There’s the moving out from the family home into a small flat, and seeing the kids only at weekends.  A downward spiral of despair and regret – not the excitement you somehow imagined.

    Let’s face it just like Christmas, people can find the anticipation better than the real thing.  How many of you get excited about Christmas and then it’s over in a flash?

    I’m a hypnotherapist, I’m not a marriage guidance counsellor but where hypnotherapy can help you is to empower you to make better choices and come to more rational decisions.  We talk about the primitive and the intellectual sides of the brain, how to start wrestling control back and begin the process of making better decisions.  It may well be a case of concluding that a relationship is over but at least you can come to that decision without the undue influence or pressure of an affair.  On the other side of the coin, as a hypnotherapist I can help you put more drive into making your relationships work and avoid the distress and misery of a broken down relationship.

    Finally, I feel it’s absolutely necessary to show my gratitude for my good friend Donald from across the pond. You my friend are an inspiration, and I’m thankful for your input without which this blog wouldn’t have been written.

    For counselling, support and information for all relationships https://www.relate.org.uk